13. Spirituality Pursuits with Ibogaine
I had a spiritual awakening at 21 when I started to question my place in the world as a being, soul and consciousness. It propelled me into a path of learning and self discovery on the path of meditation, energy based practices and a lot of exploration in pushing the boundaries of consciousness. The desire stayed and just deepened. But Life felt stoic, monotonous and over domesticated to the system that I had somehow tried to and 'fit in' in a corporate atmosphere for the last seven years. Frequent bouts of depression and mood swings due to an ongoing personal issue made sure I struggled with life without having the power to take any action to change this condition.
I had reached my limits.
After carefully considering different plant medicines, I chose to begin my journey with Ibogaine for its potential to create an impact on psychological and physical health and break out of the rut we are used to. Aided by a deep intuition , I approached Ibogaine Thailand for facilitating a psycho-spiritual experience(I did not have any substance abuse issues). After the pre health screening (ecg+blood liver test) and a phone call, we figured out that I was ready for it.
Sasha asked me to follow a strict but balanced diet (3-5 days) prior to taking the plant medicine. I followed it assiduously to the best of my abilities. I was put in a beach resort which felt like home and Sasha and Fibi made sure I felt comfortable and relaxed by visiting me in the evening once I reached the location. They explained the whole process and clarified my questions, altogether an environment of faith and trust was created.The next day morning around 10 AM , Sasha gave the medicine and I lied down once I started feeling it affecting my consciousness. The visionary states started after about 45 minutes with strange visuals pouring in. I had the theme of an elephant eye and medicine woman along with a Tibetan chanting that kept repeating at regular intervals when the medicine moved around different parts of the body. As soon as the medicine was absorbed into the body, there was this intense motor like sound along with strong currents of energy that started moving specially concentrated in the head and I observed in my inner vision a lot of black smokey like substances being cleansed/purged with white light. It was hard to move in bed as muscle co-ordination was impaired and also the field of vision had a lot of trailing light. I saw a fairie waving a wand (which Sasha told are forest fairies and a lot are found around this island). This phase lasted close to 7-8 hours - a state of dreaming awake.
After that I was offered a booster dose to go deeper into issues that were bothering me in my life. But my body threw out and I still regret that. I look a little more and spent my night awake allowing the plant medicine to clear my mental and neural pathways for the better -- though the feeling of time passing by wasn'y noticeable.
On seeing me , the first impression that Sasha had was that my eyes had become almost spotless white. I felt zen-like and saw trails of light around objects and also when moving my hand (in low light, its more) for another three days. During the experience, Sasha and Fibi monitored all my vitals and regularly ingested water in periodic intervals taking turns and being with me continuously for 24-36 hours. This is important as Ibogaine process is physically disorienting and mentally demanding and should not be attempted independently without sufficient knowledge of the plant intake procedure. Fibi and Sasha follows the MAPS (multi disciplinary association for psychedelic studies) protocols with a high level of integrity accompanied by a rational dose of operating procedure when dealing with Ibogaine.
Its been close to a month now and I maintained a personal video log of how my perceptions have changed. Primarily the mood swings and bouts of low energy based depression syndromes haven't returned after Ibogaine -- which is a huge relief. On the positive side, I started making major life style changes that can help to break out of this rutful fear based living. I feel my mind is more fluid and can make choices and consider different options which I never knew I had before due to self
imposed limitations.
Enrolled in a course to reskill myself in terms of career as well as connected with a good set of friends (like-minded souls) as I am making a major location shift in terms of my working conditions.The journey is endless and ongoing. Ibogaine may not be the magic bullet for all illness of body, mind and soul but it can certainly give one the window of opportunity for change and also it doesn't hurt to take it once in a while when we need it.
There is no doubt that Ibogaine Thailand are the best facilitators around this region! Peace and Love.
Enjoy the journey!