21. My heart opening experience with the divine spirit of Iboga.
I became interested in Iboga medicine after seeing a documentary by the name “The Reality
of Truth” on youtube. After that I started doing research on Iboga medicine and found Ibogaine
Thailand through Google. I contacted Sasha via their website and he provided the details
explaining the steps I’d have to follow before he could accept me for treatment with Iboga
medicine. After couple of weeks I submitted my medical reports (ECG & Blood Liver Panel)
to Sasha and had a one-on-on call over Skype. Having successfully passed the pre-
treatment screening, we locked in a date and my accommodation in Thailand was organised
by Sasha.
When I arrived Sasha went through the procedure in careful details and
provided me guidance on how I could set my intentions and structure my questions to spirit
of Iboga during the treatment. I had my flood dose around 10am the next day. After taking
the medicine, I lied down on the bed with ear buds, eye mask and waited for the effect to
come in. During this time, Sasha continued to check my blood pressure every 30 mins and
kept me hydrated by giving me coconut water drink. Sasha made sure everything is perfectly
taken care of, so I can fully concentrate on the Iboga experience and nothing else.
My personal experience with the spirit of Iboga was very different to what I thought it was
going to be. Based on what I’ve seen and read online, I was actually expecting a
combination of psychedelic visuals, visions and direct answers to my questions within an
hour or so from me taking the flood dose. I remember asking my first question about one and
half hours from taking the flood dose but didn’t see or hear anything other than seeing what
appeared to be some squiggly lines in my peripheral vision. At the time I couldn’t recall
anything eventful happening during the hours that followed and I was somewhat
disappointed thinking that I didn’t take enough of a dosage for the medicine to actually work.
Sasha and Fibi took turns taking good care of me on a roster. They regularly checked my
blood pressure, kept me hydrated and helped me to move between the bed and the
washroom.
My recollection of how the next few days spanned out is bit sketchy. Next day I remember
feeling emotionally down and Sasha told me it’s quite normal for people to feel that way
while Iboga medicine works though you. Later during the night to my surprise, I started
getting fragments of memories from the previous day. I remember how I saw a photo of me
when I was about two years old, a certain heart-breaking event that I experienced when I
was about nine years old and some other personal events from the past. What followed from
there is difficult for me to put in writing. I received a series of insights, which came to me
progressively, each one building upon the previous one, ending up in a climax and had me in
tears of joy. I was overwhelmed by love, joy and gratitude. Then I came to realise in my
heart how the spirit of Iboga knew exactly how to deliver the message to me in a way that
was very personal to me. I was overwhelmed with gratitude towards the spirit of Iboga, how
it healed me in the best way I couldn’t even imagine to be possible with such unconditional
love. In my opinion, there’s no human therapist in the planet who could get anywhere even
remotely close to the divine spirit of Iboga when it comes to its healing powers. I had no idea
that my heart was closed until Iboga opened it up for me and I could start feeling it again.
From this moment onwards, I started experiencing a continuing lucid dream every time I
closed my eyes. This went on for few days including on the flight back home. I still can’t work
out to this day, where the plot for this dream came from as it was way too epic to have
generated from within my own imagination. To give a brief idea, I was seeing the beginning
of the universe, the rise and fall of human and non-human civilisations over multiple aeons
and so on. I was questioning my own sanity at times because of the things I was seeing and
experiencing.
As of this writing, it has been about six weeks since my experience with spirit of Iboga. I no
longer experience the lucid dream but still feels very much connected to my heart like never
before. Have been practicing heart coherence meditation daily and also started practising
the exercises from Falun Gong.
Below are some of the lessons I learned through my experience with the spirit of Iboga:
1. Our moral code (which is a function of the analytical mind) is like a set of training wheels
on a bike. The same way the training wheels keeps us from falling off the bike the moral
code keeps us from doing the wrong thing. Opening of the heart is like when you finally learn
how to balance the bike. It’s difficult to explain but there’s an inner instinct that steer you in
the right direction without having to put any thought. Once the heart is open, you don’t need
a moral code to do the right thing.
2. Unconditional love is very rare and most love we experience is a representation of love
created by the mind. For example, a person who loves their pet doesn’t necessarily love the
pet unconditionally. Rather, they’re attached to the feeling which they mistake for love.
Unconditional love and attachment are two entirely different things. One you cling to and the
other one is about letting go.
3. Our inability to fully love ourselves unconditionally creates a void in us all. This void
creates a craving in the mind which in turn looks for ways to fill it using external simulations
experienced via the five senses. Since the mind can’t fill the void in the heart, we humans go
into a perpetual cycle of craving, aversion, birth, death and re-birth. It’s like a Deer chasing a
mirage.
What I wrote above might make sense to some and not so for others. Unfortunately, I feel
language is a very blunt tool when it comes to explaining things related to the heart. Put it
simply, no amount of reading can substitute a meeting with the divine! I understand that
Iboga medicine might not be for everyone but if you are that person who’s ready, then I
would highly recommend you reach out to Sasha and Fibi. I know they’ll look after you the
same way they looked after me. I’m so grateful to Sasha and Fibi and they will have a
special place in my heart always. Peace and Love!